Enveloping Darkness: IFcomp 2021

Enveloping Darkness is a choice-based story by John Muhlhauser, Helen Pluta, and Othniel Aryee that was entered into IFcomp 2021.

This cleanly written fantasy adventure is light on details. For example, the protagonist's brother feels like less of a family member and more of a placeholder to provide motivation for the journey.

I did appreciate the number of choices that Enveloping Darkness offers. The passages are short, and the reader is presented with something to do at the end of each one.

However, it would have been helpful if choices hinted at possible outcomes. I got killed early by trying to rescue an innocent victim, and at one point I spent two inexplicable months in a boat on the lake. It was a complete surprise when the story ended and I was praised for saving the realm.

Enveloping Darkness also includes several fantasy creatures that don’t feel connected to the narrative. Orcs are used as generic outsiders: some are helpful, some are violent, and some are infested with parasitic brain worms. If they were replaced with Canadians, the overall experience would remain unchanged.

This story could use some developmental edits.